


the conception series

by ntkrrs



Category: InuYasha - A Feudal Fairy Tale, 半妖の夜叉姫 | Hanyou no Yashahime | Yashahime: Princess Half-Demon (Anime)
Genre: Abandonment, F/M, Infertility
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-26
Updated: 2020-11-30
Packaged: 2021-03-10 03:07:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,311
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27726595
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ntkrrs/pseuds/ntkrrs
Summary: a series of fics tackling the outcomes of Kagome and Inuyasha having a baby.first written and posted to tumblr. tags are the themes of each chapter/oneshot; they will be added once a new chapter has been uploaded.
Relationships: Higurashi Kagome/InuYasha
Comments: 2
Kudos: 91





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> originally posted on [@notkorras](https://notkorras.tumblr.com/post/632601922293137408/heres-a-lil-inukag-fic-from-when-moroha-was-born). made minor edits and corrections.

Three days.

Kagome tried not to huff. She _knew_ Inuyasha had been feeling… apprehensive, about everything, and she knew him, she knew that she had to _build up_ to things with him, get him to warm up some to certain things. But it was hard _not_ to feel the slightest bit abandoned when, almost as soon as Moroha was born, he decided to just... up and _leave_ for three days.

The first day was fine; everything was a lot. He needed space. She could give that.

The second day, she could stretch her patience. She could understand. He needed more time.

But the _third_?

“He’s here,” Sango announced, walking in on the late afternoon on the third day, dressed in her _taijiya_ uniform. 

“How is he?” is the first thing the was out of Kagome’s mouth, even though her brain screamed for her to _sit_ him as soon as he was within _sit_ -ing range. 

The somber look on Sango's face stopped her. The _taijiya_ shook her head. “Quiet. Unlke… unlike himself.”

Kagome’s lip trembled, looking down at the baby in her arms. “Could you… could you call him? Tell him…”

Sango glanced at her. “Tell him…?”

The miko sighed. “I just. Tell him I want him here. I miss him.”

A soft look made itself known on Sango’s face. “Of course.”

Soon, the late afternoon had morphed into night, and their hut had plunged into darkness. Sango had left, and Inuyasha’s golden eyes glinted at her in the moonlight that managed to slip in through the cracks.

“Why is it so dark in here?” he asked gruffly.

The attitude made her brow twitch. “Because no one’s here to start a fire for me. In case you haven’t noticed, I just _gave birth_ ,” she snapped, more venom present in her words than necessary.

Instead of retaliating, or even the usual _keh!_ he’d throw her way, as she expected him to, her husband instead quietly shuffled to light a fire.

She frowned. “Inuyasha,” she said, eyes blinking to adjust to the sudden glow that lit the room, ebbing and flowing in a steady thrum against the darkest corners of her hut. “Inuyasha," she said again, "I can’t help you if you don’t talk to me.”

He sat towards the fire, away from her. Silence.

“We promised we’d talk, right?” she insisted. “We won’t let anything get the better of us. We’ll talk anything we have out. Even if it takes days. And it’s been days _now_.”

Crickets chirped in the air, dulling when they seeped into the cracks of her home, the soft howl of the winds hitting the walls of their hut whispering around the room. The crackle of the fire was the loudest, each spark sounding like an explosion.

Kagome bit her lip and gingerly started to get up.

Inuyasha was by her side in a flash, lips curled in displeasure. “What are you doing?!” he snarled.

“Going to you,” Kagome glared, “Since _you_ refuse to come to _me_.”

That statement seemed to erase his ire and replace it with somber melancholy. But he didn’t leave her side as soon as she settled, which she didn't know what to make of. It might unveil itself in time, she said to herself, after minutes, maybe hours, of continuous silence, and Kagome was ready to yank him down by his hair and scream at him, when he raised his hands and stared at them.

“Babies are so small,” he murmured.

Kagome didn’t speak.

“They need—they need caring hands. Warm hands. Gentle, delicate, _beautiful_ hands.” He bowed his head, staring at his lap. “I… I’ve destroyed with mine.”  
  
Kagome swallowed. “Inuyasha…”

“The past three days I’ve been—I’ve been ripping apart firewood with my hands,” he continued, growing frantic. “Destroying demons. Handling threats. I—My hands—" He looked up and stopped, as if surprised that she was listening. "My hands aren’t made for a _baby_ , Kagome.”

They both stared at his fingers, his claws glinting in the light. He was _scared_. The realization slammed into her like a raging stampede, and it she felt a heat prick the back of her eyelids. 

“I’m… I’m going to hurt her,” he declared, softly, painfully, as if it was the one thought he never wanted to release into the world.

Gently, she laid the sleeping babe down on her lap and reached out to take the hand closest to her. He looked up at her, and the expression on his face made her heart break.

“That’s not true, Inuyasha,” she mumbled, willing her voice not to waver. “You _know_ that’s not true.”

“I’m going to hurt her,” he repeated, the agony in his voice clear. “I’m… Kagome, I’m—” 

Kagome shook her head. “You’re wrong. You’ve never been more wrong in your entire _life_.” She brought his hand closer, kissed each of his fingers, the centre of his palm, and pressed his open hand against her cheek. “I love your hands,” she murmured, eyes closing as she leaned in further. “You do so much for us.”

His breath hitched. “I—”

“You catch us food, you make fires. You built this hut, you keep us safe. You comb my hair after my baths. You prepare the garden so I don’t have a hard time harvesting our crops. You hold me when I feel sad. You hug me when I miss my family. You make me feel safe. You make me feel loved. You’ve made me feel so good I can’t even _think_.”

Slowly, her voice grew more solid, more assured, more certain, but somewhere, somewhere the thought of him thinking that he wasn’t good enough to _hold_ their daughter made her heart drop and throat close up.

“You’d never hurt her,” she said, voice starting to break, “The same way you’d never hurt me.” She opened her eyes, the tenderest of gazes making his heart beat a little faster. “You’d never hurt _me_ , right?”

He swallowed, eyes looking at her with _something_ that made her feel complete. Beautiful. _Loved_. “Kagome…”

“ _Right_?” she whispered earnestly, begging. Inuyasha's face crumpled and he surged forward, catching his wife’s lips in an intense, searing kiss, careful not to crush the babe in her lap. 

He kneeled over her, curling his other hand around her nape to bring her impossibly closer. Kissing her to rid her of all her worries. He pulled away and pressed his forehead to hers, brushing a stray tear with his thumb. “I’m sorry,” he whispered, kissing her soundly. “I’m so _sorry_ , Kagome. I—”

She shook her head, her hair scratching against his. “It’s okay. It’s a lot.”

“You were here alone,” he whispered with regret, “And I left you.”

“And you’re here _now_ ,” she said, smiling. She swallowed, looking down at their baby. “Do you…” she started, gently taking the infant into her arms. Inuyasha sat back, watching her. “Do you want to hold her?”

His face was still apprehensive, but he held his arms out. Gently teaching him how to hold her, Kagome smiled at the sight of Inuyasha staring in utter awe at the babe in his arms. The jostle woke her, the baby blearily opening her eyes. She started up at the man holding her, brown eyes meeting gold, and Inuyasha fell in love all over again.

“She has your eyes,” Inuyasha pointed out absently.

Kagome giggled. “She has your mouth.”

Inuyasha tried not to choke up. “She’s so small,” he whispered with wonder.

“She’ll grow to be big and strong,” Kagome said, placing her hand on his arm. “Like her father.”

He leaned over to kiss his wife’s forehead. He looked back down at the child in his arms, taking in her wide, brown eyes, small nose, chubby cheeks, and open mouth, a smile growing on his face. “We know you’ll grow to be strong like your mother,” he said to the bundle in his arms, “Don’t we, Moroha?”


	2. blameless

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> going a total 180 from the last one. my take on ‘what if kagome’s spiritual powers were strong enough that they hijacked her body and prevented her from having children with a hanyō?’ and i actually liked how it turned out. hope you enjoy!
> 
> again, these are first published on [my tumblr](https://notkorras.tumblr.com) first.

“I... What?” Kagome said softly. Next to her, Inuyasha tensed.

Kaede closed her eyes and sighed. She had a feeling, and when nothing came to fruition months after Kagome giddily confided in the old woman about the next step in her relationship with her hanyō husband, they both came to her. When they entered her hut this morning, silent and contemplative, she realized that the feeling she had all those months ago was warranted. 

She repeated the words, the taste of them sour on her tongue. “I don’t... I don’t think it’s possible for Kagome to conceive.”

“Why?” the young priestess whispered. “I—Am I—” 

Kaede shook her head. “My theory is... I think that your powers are... _preventing_ you, to have a child." The old priestess closed her eyes. "With Inuyasha.”

“That’s insane! Why would—” Inuyasha angrily began, and he stopped. Realisation dawned on his face, and he was stricken with a certain grief. 

Kagome took a shaky breath. “What? What do you mean?”

“You’re a miko,” Kaede said carefully, opening her gaze and turning it on the young woman. “And Inuyasha is a hanyō.”

The same realisation made Kagome’s lip tremble. “That’s—That’s—”

“I don’t know for sure,” Kaede said with sympathy. “But it’s possible.”

Inuyasha abruptly stood up and left the hut and into the bright morning sun. Kagome stared at her hands.

“I’m sorry,” Kaede said. She meant it.

The young woman looked back up at her with sad, watery eyes. “Thank you.”

* * *

Inuyasha had not returned after a whole afternoon.

Kagome wanted to be angry. She wanted to find him and curse him and _sit_ him for being so stupid. He didn’t have to _run away_ , he didn’t have to deal with it on his own. 

But she knew him. And she knew he was taking this much harder than she.

Sango had kindly offered to look for the hanyō, but Kagome shook her head with a soft thanks. She knew him well enough to know where he would be. And true enough, come sunset, she found him on one of the branches of the Goshinboku.

“Inuyasha, please come down,” Kagome asked softly, sitting at the base of the Goshinboku, knees folded against her chest. She’d been waiting for what must have been hours, back against the large tree. It started to get dark, gloomy. A storm was coming.

“Inuyasha,” she said again, just as thunder rumbled in the sky. The air started to smell of rain, and _plip_ s of water started to resound around her. Rain started to shower on the forest, and she simply pulled into herself, forehead resting on her knees, ignoring the raindrops that fell on her body. She tried not to cry.

Moments later, she felt a familiar _suikan_ cover her head, and she looked up to find a soaked Inuyasha looking at her with muted concern. “Come on, let’s find shelter,” he muttered, and she nodded. 

Inuyasha carried her as he ran through the forest. They found a shallow cave, partially hidden by a thicket, and huddled in. As Kagome wrung out the suikan, Inuyasha started a fire in silence, staring into the flames. Gently, Kagome nudged his shoulder to have him take it off.

“We should dry it,” she said softly. He nodded and followed, and wordlessly, he pushed Kagome’s clothes off. She let him.

When all that was left was her damp _kosode,_ he led her to get close enough to the fire. The rain outside was strong but not torrential, the cave echoing a lone stream of water that dripped steadily. 

The whole time they were in the cave, Kagome’s eyes were on anything but Inuyasha. But now, he tipped her chin to look at him, and the look in his eyes made her chest clench painfully.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered, and kissed her. The contact was something her body desperately craved, and she pushed herself against him, trying to get as close as possible. Her husband took her face in one hand and pulled her closer with the other, as if trying to bring her into him. She didn’t even realise she was crying until he pulled away. “Don’t cry, Kagome. I... I’m sorry.”

She shook her head. “It’s not your fault,” Kagome insisted. “It’s _not_ , Inuyasha.”

Inuyasha looked away. “I wanted to give you children,” he admitted, and her gut twisted painfully. “But maybe...” he continued, voice straining, “Maybe if you never met me, you—you would—” Inuyasha seemed to struggle. "I—I'm sor—"

She took his face in her hands and forced him to meet her teary gaze. The forlorn sadness in his eyes made her heart ache. 

“It's not your fault," she said firmly.

His eyes darkened, his sadness rivalling the storm clouds that rumbled beyond them. "You deserve to be happy. Even with... with someone else. Someone who can give you what you _want_."

The mere _thought_ of someone _else_ being the father of her children brought her a physical pain she didn’t know she could experience. 

"I don’t _want_ children that aren’t yours,” she said harshly, truthfully, desperately, a fire behind her words. “My happiness doesn’t outweigh yours, Inuyasha. What you can or cannot give me, or what we can or cannot do together—it doesn’t matter. It doesn’t. It’s always you. Past or future, it’s _always_ gonna be you.”

“Kagome,” he whispered, fingers brushing away a tear that she didn’t even realise she’d shed.

“I love you,” she hissed, angry that he would _ever_ think that she would ever, _ever_ choose anyone else over him. “I _love_ _you_!Children or no, in the future or never! _It doesn’t matter_! I love you _now_. I’ll love you _always_! Okay?” Her anger almost instantly extinguished itself, leaving only ashes of sorrow. Her voice broke, and a sob escaped her. “ _Okay_?”

Inuyasha pulled her close, stroking her hair as she cried. “Okay,” he mumbled, holding her as she shook and sobbed into his chest. “Okay.”


End file.
